1. |
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place me on the windowsill
to gather dust in the corner of
your mind, never heart
allow me to decompose
you grafted love unto my branches
but now I have grown apart
I'm giving it an honest go
I'm giving it an honest start
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2. |
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I wanna blast out my eardrums
and ask you many questions
are the photos of us still hung up
or did you tear them into pieces?
have you found your way to happiness
or is that best left a secret?
one day you'll open up your drawer
and see the letter that I wrote
the one where I said I'd take a risk
where love stuttered in my throat
you'll hesitate and close it back
and never look at it again
or set it on fire
burn up the kind words that I sent
I think that
we still talk
but it doesn't feel quite the same
i'll gather dust
on your shelf
or hang like a picture frame
you never let me in your heart
no one ever said you had to
but you made a mess of what I had
like a dirty hotel room
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3. |
Sweet
02:19
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shoutout to brandon (blue ambient) for sipping on a beverage while I recorded this
----------------------------------------------------------------
cherry stems in your bed
forget me when I'm dead
love me, just in your head
forget me when I'm dead
hide your heart under the kitchen sink
remove your jaw to avoid speaking
do you think next ear
the stems and seeds will bud into a tree?
did you think next year you'd find a friend in me?
I think that's pretty sweet
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4. |
Mice party!
01:55
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toothache
prolonged
three days
flesh columns
of a sad estate
I never had the time of
day
for anyone except the mice who
played
in my grandmother's
yard
drinking
phosphate
descry
distaste
writ sects bred of red paint
corduroy to match our growing
pains
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5. |
October
02:09
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you cut your hair
your eyes made visible
I dusted off my quiet state of being
in exchange for a newfound effort
you said
"you don't have to be worried, I'm okay"
I swore I'd say the same
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6. |
Sticks
02:43
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I tried
to hold back
everything that I
didn't really like about myself
it didn't work out
too well
and that's when I said
I should eat dinner
but I knew that I'd
just let it stay cold
No use wasting what I could sleep through
7.
Transient 02:26
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7. |
Transient
02:26
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originally released on a split with the cool n talented artist Saint Tomorrow
--------------------------------------------------
I will model my home
just like a hotel room
every night I arrive a stranger
every morning, bid my depart
I did nothing for it
nothing for me
lacking in all memory
mundane enough to serve its purpose
yet with glimmers of
half-attempted Xenia
another place to
dissociate
because I'be been made to feel like
someone available for only a night not to be remembered or recalled
nor somewhere filled with memory, most of all
"good morning"
didja sleep well?
head over
heels
fall
to the ground
you always smelled of strawberry lipgloss
and artificial love
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8. |
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inspired from a lovely conversation I had in late winter of this year, a little chunk of it's in the lyric section
---------------------------------------------------------
"...and for the sun to shine"
so soon and we'll be able to appreciate it all
"we'll get to go on walks without coats"
and the whole world will be in bloom for a bit
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9. |
Lullaby
03:02
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talking
like we used to
before
things changed
but now the
words tend to
make your chest ache
do you remember
when we walked
across your campus
and sat by the lake?
I should've held
your hand
but my courage left
before you did
the day we spent is gone
but you're not
but my hopes are hanging higher
than my head
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10. |
Howdi (for Darby!)
02:59
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sample at the beginning from Peter Pan
-----------------------------------------
love is something we contrived
I'm sorry it's conflicting
I still wish he was by my side
but I feel like that's attrition
my heart is full of butterflies
in my stomach, a sick feeling
I am ready to nosedive
I am floating through the ceiling
you thought that you read like
Danielewski
well if it wasn't all thanks to your eyes
I wouldn't know your doing
it's kinda dumb you thought that I
wasn't pursuing
we could cast our eyes to the sky
we won't know why
I've never met a heart so kind
it's kind of like
I've never had a heart like mine
that told a lie
I've never had a heart so kind
I never tried
but I'll do it if you take mine
I wouldn't mind
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11. |
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listen to this with only one earbud in, i dare u. different poems in each ear. <3
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Left ear:
my interest in you at last decays
as spring begins a lazy haze
and sweet sceneries approach
I would ask if you have noticed
but I realized that I've grown
and I wouldn't quite care,
even had you known
you shouldn't feel proud
I'm almost sure you don't
I've grown, I've grown, I've grown
winters flown; we're both left alone
digging ground is productivity
so build yourself a moat
let the soil become fertile
but not to serve as bed
for your thinning bones
you too have grown,
you too have grown
don't let this weather
turn you to stone
don't let the clouds
mask the sunlight shown
and don't let the songbirds sounds
low'r your softening tone
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Right ear:
she asks if we're close and I tell her I don't know
another sings loudly in my ear but I try not to mind
I don't have much to say and I'm out of words to write
I look up and I smile. I imagine it on film. grains are revealed from a sunny exposure. my body is then wrenched forward and the slam of my frame through the glass does not echo. I do not shatter against the concrete like porcelain but jolt with a sudden cease of motion. my neck snaps from whiplash and my mouth continues to move, as if mouthing a prayer or gasping for air. perhaps one in the same. beyond the wall, my old backyard. I've never seen a valley, I wouldn't know it if I had. it's only natural to feel this way and it's only right to look up and smile.
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chord organ tapes San Antonio, Texas
Est. 2019
small, humble, super diy tape label.
sincere lo-fi bedroom recordings.
Based in San Antone, Tx.
chordorgantapes@gmail.com
SUBMISSIONS CLOSED
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